Lonelygirl15

There are great mothers, there are horrible mothers and there are a million who fall somewhere in between the two.

In my opinion that is one reason telling me that mothering is not just instinctive.
It is something you work at or you don't, you can get better at it or not.

I want the credit for being a good mom, I would not want someone telling me it was just instinct.

I am surprised as I study this, at the seemingly majority who believe in maternal instinct as fact. I never really thought about this before .




<and Taiya I am sorry your experience with motherhood was painful>

I did read one article (and I'll have to go back and try to find it) that talks about motherhood being a very difficult issue. You upset people no matter what stand you take on an issue. It was actually a fairly intelligent article.

I can't find very much on Elyse Rubenstein. All I can find is references that say she is a psychiatrist and that she says the maternal instinct exists.

(as for my mom, well, it is what it is)

I have not done ANY of the assigned reading yet - but I just wanted to weigh in on this maternal instinct stuff before I do. Maybe I will change my mind - but this is where I am coming from.

Maternal instinct as a phenomenon exists. It not only exists in humans but in any other species where the young need to be cared for until they care for themselves. In some species this means only their own young (with instances of the killing of the young of others), in others any young (even of another species) - and in some, most notably other primates, both.

What I believe we are discussing here is how that "instinct" affects our concious thought. We have many instincts that come from an entirely different part of our brain then our concious thought. Sex, Hunger, Survival (Flight or Fight) - even, the latest neurological studies show, our connection perhaps with a "higher power". Our concious rational mind needs to make sense of these, sometimes, seemingly-irrational impulses or instincts and yet they often form the majority of our concious thought (I find I think about sex constantly ) So in discussing the Maternal instinct we are not just discussing the instinct itself but how we percieve it in relationship to our lives. A great book on the discussion of this (and I have posted this before - so I greatfully receive another trout) is Phantoms in the Brain: Probing the Mysteries of the Human Mind by by V. S. Ramachandran & Sandra Blakeslee.

Harumph - now I will sit down and do the required reading.

Well, if you do the reading, you will see that other species can be very cruel to their young. I did like reading Sarah Blaffer Hrdy who suggested that the maternal instinct is more of a complex survival mechanism.

where is the new password? why can't i find it?

the ewnay asswordpay is ealityray



This is all going to depend on how one defines "maternal instinct." It's a semantic question.

Nora Volkova wrote:the ewnay asswordpay is ealityray

I tried to anagram this at first. GAH.

S is for Summer wrote:

Nora Volkova wrote:the ewnay asswordpay is ealityray

I tried to anagram this at first. GAH.

Haha...yeah, thats not how we roll here at HSA. Balls to anagrams! Give me existential quandary or give me death.

Though...it does seem that Ms. Kelly IS watching...
->J

JoannaChildsface wrote:Haha...yeah, thats not how we roll here at HSA. Balls to anagrams! Give me existential quandary or give me death.

->J

I do believe that wins quote of the night!

Hey, thanks!


->J

S is for Summer wrote:

Nora Volkova wrote:the ewnay asswordpay is ealityray

I tried to anagram this at first. GAH.

At least no one took it literally, I'd hate to think what asswordpay is

And I second the vote for quote of the night, and goodnight.

toadlguy wrote:At least no one took it literally, I'd hate to think what asswordpay is

And I second the vote for quote of the night, and goodnight.

Oh my gosh. I just laughed so loudly and so suddenly. xD

Sleep well, TL.

I just noticed that we all mistakenly blew off a question earlier -- sorry!

Elyse Rubenstein is, I believe, the expert in post-partum depression?

Do you have any links to Elyse Rubenstein's work? I couldn't find anything substantial.

The problem is that there are two Dr. Elyse Rubensteins -- one in Los Angeles, who is an arthritis specialist, and a psychiatrist in Philadelphia.

The Philadelphia doctor is the relevant one -- here are a few links: (er, here is A link, I guess...)

http://www.babycenter.com/refcap/baby/b ... /9897.html


There isn't very much substantial on the net, as you've pointed out. I think the fact that she is a clinical, rather than a research psychiatrist suggests that she talks about "maternal instinct" in a clinical sense, using it as a talking point to reassure nervous prospective mothers.